Don’t allow yourself to believe that whatever you feel or are going through is only yours to carry. I have learned the hard way that if I can fill my cup with negative things then I can also fill it with positives. In that moment when I think something bad I can also choose to negate it and replace it with something good. You wouldn’t let your best friend heck even a stranger on the internet talk that way to themselves so why would you do it to yourself?
I must admit that I can be my own worst enemy. You’d think that because I spend a lot of time with myself writing and vlogging then I would be kinder, nicer, gentler but no. It is BECAUSE I know myself so intimately that there are parts of me that I can’t hide, I have nowhere to go & can’t escape myself.
I wish I would spend hours on end being my own cheerleader but Alas! on my worst days I have been the one to tear myself down. To beat myself up & drag me through the mud and yet I have shown more compassion to that girl I just met in the bathroom drunk as a skunk talking to herself in the mirror&calling everyone who passes by sweety.
It’s so easy to pretend with other people. All you have to do is smile when they ask if you’re okay or ignore WhatsApp or delete that long paragraph reply and send a short one but the feeling inside of me is what is in the long paragraph reply I just deleted.
Sis, is this you? Are you me?
Bro, is this you?
Oh hun **hugs**
I am sending you virtual hugs because we live apart and can’t meet for a real hug.
I ploy you to always always find someone you can confide in and tell if something is wrong.
Sometimes it’s hard enough admitting to ourselves that something is wrong and when we do we think “If I can’t tell the person closest to me then who can I tell?” Don’t buy into it!
Tell someone else.
Tell another (trusted) friend, call your mother, tell the girl in your Bible study group, tell the stranger who strikes up a conversation with you in the matatu but just make sure they aren’t your neighbour because then they tell everyone your business and then you’re THAT GURL or BOY in the estate who has everything put together. You get what I mean yeah?🙆
Oh and if all else fails, whisper or shout or scream or cry to the universe because even tears are prayers and God hears us all so you’re not alone.
So here’s to you, having open, meaningful, heart wrenching conversations with yourself.
Be kind to yourself 😘and see what happens…